suck

hey everyone! My summer is going pretty good. It has its ups and downs. I've come to expect though after I hit a really good up day, the down day will come next... and so on and so forth. But anyway... how is everyone? Im really busy with the DYPAC camp, my band, teaching colorguard again haha, writing songs, playing piano, EMU catering, getting ready to go back to school (woo hoo), and getting ready for Bryan to move to Baltimore. I'm trying not to think about it. Just when I feel like my head and my heart are fixed and in the right place he's got to up and move on me. Its ok though... I understand... he needs a job... and Im trying not to be selfish. But i dont want him to go. In a sense... I mean I'll be at school anyway for the year and wouldnt get to see him much even if he were here... but I hate long distance shit. We did that before... it sucked balls. On the weekends I might beable to see him if I fly out there... but oooh yea... my band plays every weekend. it sucks. no way around it. been trying to channel most of this negativity into my writing. I think I suck at it hard core... but it its only the beginning and it makes me happy. this sucks. Grr I start thinking about it and look what happens. 2 years... this sucks.

anyway... I guess this is why I dont update for real that often. It makes me think about my life and we all know I dont want to do that! because it always ends up the same... sucky.